Am I a cat hater? No. A cat loather? Not at all. Do I like cats? Nope. I love cat/kitten videos, but that's as far as it goes because...cats are major asthma triggers. Like, emergency room asthma. The whole not breathing, ((body falls down)) routine. But, there's another reason I don't have 'em.

Because they're lousy lovers.

iStock

Obviously there are exceptions, but for the most part, yeah, cats are like lousy lovers. They come around when they need some lovin', you give 'em what they want, they like it, you suggest sticking around a little longer, maybe just thru the night, OK? That's when they scratch you and run away and ignore you for two or three weeks. And spray everything they can.

OK, that last part is limited to cats, but you know what I mean.

Oh, and they knock stuff off counters. That means my Jack Daniels isn't safe. :)

Listen to James Rabe 6a to 10a on Y-105 FM, and 2p to 6p on 103.9 The Doc.